here's another post.but with a different mood different thinking and different way.
my best cousin,Kar Mun came back from KL and stay over my house.i am damn excited of course!
we had pillow talk as usual lah whenever we met.
missed her so!
we talked everything happening around us.we share problems.
so few days before,something happened.somekind of rumours or news or whatever blah.
but it is absolutely bad.i felt so down and sad andddd angry anddd funny andddd depressed.i just dont know how to handle it.i've been told that i must handle this problem with care.one wrong step,you will be totally ruined.
i told Kar Mun my problem.
she too felt sad and anger for me.i nearly cried my shit off when i spilt out the problem.
but if i really burst my tears off,nothing to be so shock,i've been crying when i bathed,before i sleep,thinking this problem over and over again.
i felt so lost.i dont know what to do.i asked myself whats wrong?why things happened in a short time?everything was like being arranged.i just dont know how to tell how sad i feel through writing.
but what can i say it is about Friendship.
i dont want to say anymore further because i think there's no point to let the world know.nothing to be proud of.
Best Friends or Friendship are two-way traffic.
both sides must have equally disburse their feelings,thoughts or whatever that are meant to to build up a hard-core friendship.
best friends doesnt exist when there is only one way traffic which means only one side do the pay out for everything but the another side just do nothing.this means the another side doesnt really mean to build up this friendship together.
together makes everything alright.without the together,nothing is avaiable.
Karmun have many besties in her friendships.she is the lucky one.
evrn karmun think that what i faced was so unlucky.and i am the unlucky one to have such friends problems.i do agree with kar mun that i am quite unlucky in picking or having friends.
but maybe i am lucky still compare with others that does not have best friends or true friends.i think... heh.consoling myself.==
sometimes i asked my self.why cant i have a happy perhaps best friends or friendship in my secondary life,without sadness,without arguement,without backstabbing each other,without hatre.i love friends! i honestly tell.but i found that are worth for you to love?to care?to share??
i hope they are.but things that happened really hurts.what they said really hurt me deeply.what can i say still?what can i explain?will my explaination be accepted?who knows?i guess they wont trust me either.i dont want to let this problem extend much more further.i want to solve it!once you didnt solve a problem,the problem will still exist and persecute you.who will suffer?not them.but me myself.i want to solve.eager enough to solve.but what steps should i take.a wrong step may ruin everything you know!i am scared enough to walk out and explain.afraid that the more i explain,the worst it will be.some tell me like this.some tell me like that.let it flow with the air and time?!puzzle.
i keep my fingers cross and hope everything will be fine.i pray hrad to the god.hope god hears me.thanks. :)
thanks for all the share and care and loves from my besties,Kar Mun,Jia Ki and Jing Fei.appreciation from the bottom of my heart.
honestly,you all are there with me no matter what happen.cares about me without fail.happy and luckyyy to have you all.i promise,i will be there for you all too!because i meant to!
Best Friends are two-way traffic ryte! heh. thankyou Kar Mun for teaching me this principle. :3
tomorrow will be a whole new good fine best day.heeeeeeh.
no matter what,i still have to keep going on with my studies.
p/s:my add math teacher asked me to finish the whole form 4 add math revision book within the 1st week of holiday,but i am sorry to say that i've fail to accomplish.felt so bad.but i promise i will finish it up before school reopen!please,lazy bug get away form my body.concentration and harwork needed! wish me luck babe! =)
time to off to bed.
goodnight everyone.
sleep tight!heh.
2:44am 8th Jun 2009.
noted.
Lim Sue Ting
that's me LST! XD
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